第一卷,起源 第一章 进击神经病(2 / 2)

疯狂视界 缚骨斋 0 字 2021-08-04

楚南扭头看着脸色阴晴不定的杨伟:“院长,你知道这是咋回事儿么?”

杨伟也扭过头看着楚南:“我要是知道刚才就不会尿裤子了……处男,咱商量个事儿?你能不能把你那裤子借我一条?”

“里面的还是外面的?”楚南沉默了一会儿,讲道理,不穿内裤和只穿内裤两种行为到底哪种更变态这种问题,属实不是一般人能想明白的,如果可以他哪个都不想选。

杨伟也沉默了一会儿:“外面的吧,好歹只是勒腰,里面的那条……勒蛋。”

楚南看了一眼他的浑圆腰身,真特么有道理,最终咬牙脱下了自己的外裤,扔给了对方。好歹内衣裤都没被换过,而楚南已经习惯了穿宽松的平角裤,乍一看也不至于泄露个人隐·私。

等杨伟费劲巴拉把明显小了不止一号的病号裤套上后,总算是松了一口气,这个时候又把注意力放在了这离奇的情况上:“刚刚那几个医生警卫都是病人啊。”他虽然是院长,但是不少病人的资料都烂熟于心,在这一点上杨伟是个合格的负责任的院长。他虽然当时被吓得哆嗦出尿来,但还是辨认出了对方的长相呵身份。

“我觉得也是。就是忘了是哪个病房的了。”楚南摸了摸脖子,刚才那剁骨刀就离他的脖子就几毫米,现在还感觉有点凉飕飕的。

“他们怎么跑出来的?守夜的警卫和值夜班的护理都是瞎子吗?”杨伟怨气非常深重,可是捉摸了片刻又感觉不对,“这些神经病怎么做到在不弄醒任何一个人的情况下把我们搬到这里来的?”

楚南摇摇头:“不知道,我睡觉很容易醒的,但是没有感觉到有人触碰我。”在精神病医院当医生和护理的,没几个睡觉能睡的特别死的。没办法,每天看护这些神经病,真的累的很。

“我看刚才那电锯上还带血,还是新鲜的,恐怕已经有人没了。”杨伟心有余悸,忽然想起了什么,“报警,赶紧报警!”

楚南扭头看着空荡荡的床头,和翻找手机无果的杨伟对视着:“我有点怀疑他们到底还是不是神经病。”

杨伟低声说道:“身上手机不见了,不过我还有备用的在办公室抽屉里,要不我们想个办法?”那是他专门用来打游戏看电影的手机,不过卡也是有的,能打电话。

楚南沉默了一会儿:“我怕我们还没摸到办公室,半路上就被那两个神经病给大卸八块了,你也说了,那电锯上还带着血呢。这要是被他们逮到了,恐怕当场血就滋到天花板上去了。”

杨伟看着自己的体型,不说话了。

没等两人再考虑对策,外面已经有广播响了:“各位病人准备到食堂集中就餐。”

“明明我们才是真正的正常人,结果被一群神经病喊病人,真是讽刺。”杨伟心态有点崩。楚南没什么感触,光着两条大长腿直接往门外走去,迎面就看见对面病房里走出来两个瑟瑟发抖的女护理。楚南琢磨,自己不能到死都单身,被一群神经病劫持了,指不定哪天自己就嗝屁了,此时不趁虚而入,那真是活该单身一辈子。据说撩妹子要思虑长远,一步到位,于是他脸色严肃看着两个妹子:“我们合葬吧。”

“???”护理妹子呆了一下,随即脸都黑了,两人搀扶着转头就走。

“哎?你等等,太急了吗?那我们生孩子吧!实在不行,结婚也可以啊!”楚南傻眼了,这tm跟网上说的不一样啊!

后面提着裤子靠过来的杨伟惊了:“你单身不是没有原因的啊兄弟!”

楚南呵呵,面无表情向食堂走去,心里还有点想不明白为什么跟网上说的不一样,难道是因为她们太矜持了?

一路上许许多多的“病人”从病房里走出来,三五成群开始交头接耳,大多都是惊慌失措,路过一间病房的时候楚南和杨伟同时一个激灵,两具无头尸体倒在了地上,严格来说不是无头,而是被电锯掀掉了半个天灵盖,红的白的涂了一地。

楚南有点犯恶心,扭头向前走,浑身直起鸡皮疙瘩。

“太惨了,你说我们不会也被掀天灵盖吧……”杨伟脸色铁青。

楚南沉吟片刻:“不一定。”

杨伟脸色刚缓和,楚南就补了一句:“说不定会被解刨。”

“……你可真会安慰人,谢谢嗷!”

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